CHARTS & TRENDS
by &created 03 May 2013&| last updated - 03 Jul 2013
Sometimes when you're watching a movie that makes you horny and you're all alone, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do.
Lick it and stick it.
Nuff said.
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A pretty, popular teenager can't go out on a date until her ill-tempered older sister does. (97 mins.)
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&&You know what I don't hate about you? A hot, blonde, 17 yo Julia Stiles dancing around drunk and all horned up on a table after a few douche bags feed her free alcohol in exchange for her firm boobie hugs and hj's at an out of control high-school party. Don't forget the barely budding boobs of 16 yo Larisa Oleynik whose hoo-hoo cannot wait to be discovered on her first date. Sure, it's a take-off from Shake-His-Spear's &The Taming Of The Shrew&, but don't forget, this mov is more about white alabaster mounds than it is about Iambic Pentameter. Does anyone else appreciate when hot daughters lie to daddy? I turned lying to daddy into an art form, and have written several hot books on the subject. Guess who plays dear ole dad? The dad from &Clueless& (Dan Hedaya). I guess he jumps at the chance to play the father who cannot pick the forbidden fruit of his coming of age daughters. We all know that bald, middle-aged, overweight men have a weakness for the woo- butt this time his will is strong, and nothing happens, so mommy does not divorce daddy. There are way too many Italian stallions in this thing, but we will forgive this 1999 oversight for the moment.
What does my snatch hate about this movie...nothing!&& - melissaogasaki
A 16 year old girl prepares a list of 16 wishes for 8 years, hoping they will come true on her 16th birthday... (90 mins.)
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&&Cute little Debby Ryan actually is 16 in this movie about a sweet 16 party that has magical repercussions.
You know what else has the number 16 concerning this movie? The 16 red candles that I lit during this movie while I went all naughty in my bedroom under the covers.
Those tight little teen outfits in this movie just did it for me.
This flick did the trick 16 times before my little brother almost walked in on me and I had to quit.&& - melissaogasaki
Kate is about to graduate. Her biggest dream is to have sex with Ryan Lambert. The only problem is that Ryan refuses to have sex with a virgin... (86 mins.)
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&&Olivia Alaina May has a super-tight, 18 yo virgin vagina that needs to get overrun like the Visigoths ravaged Rome. One suggestion Olivia, shave the V of that barely legal love tunnel before a potential bf puts his spicy Italian sausage in your untouched hot dog warmer. Don't miss the gamer girl scene just a few minutes in where she bends over and shows us that upside down heart shaped hiney we all wish our gf's had. Shhhh, don't let your chubby wife bust you reading this list. Those fatties will divorce you in 2 minutes when they catch you texting me. Don't blame me when your crappy relationship runs ashore bc I really get a chance to turn you on. There's nothing wrong with a married man sexting a single girl.
It's completely natural, just like Olivia Alaina's boobs.&& - melissaogasaki
Routinely exploited by her wicked stepmother, the downtrodden Sam Montgomery is excited about the prospect of meeting her Internet beau at the school's Halloween dance. (95 mins.)
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&&This Cinderella story is all about Hilary's Duff walking around for us to judge. We all know that 16 yo Hilary is in her prime in 2004, and has a duff that just won't quit. Don't worry, you will have the opportunity to see her bend over in tight pants and see some downblouse action to beat the boner band. Don't feel guilty, she's in her twenties now, and has made millions off of many of us who have gotten off.
Check out those recent pics on google of her in yoga pants.
It nearly made my head explode.&& - melissaogasaki
A troubled young woman moves to San Francisco, where she becomes involved in pornography and aligns herself with a cocaine-addicted lawyer. (98 mins.)
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&&Our dirty little braided schoolgirl Ashley Henshaw is a 22 yo hottie who plays a teen that Heather Graham just can't get enough of. Big ole' down syndrome forehead Heather tells her that her body is a work of art. You know what else is a work of art? My opening flower when Trashley Henshaw shows us the nip nips and a little drippy drip comes out into my white cotton panties. It's ok, girl jizz is white, and we all know that white is all-right.
This movie is all about Cherry, and my cherry is all about this movie. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
After a car accident, a young woman who is caught between life and death, meets a funeral director who appears to have the gift of transitioning the dead into the afterlife. (104 mins.)
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&&After her nude debut in Prozac Nation, Christina Ricci just didn't get enough exhibitionism out of her system, so this time she goes full frontal and full bubble butt nudity in this drama/suspense. We all know our cute little Chrissy loves to play the dark, creepy and sarcastic goth girl...butt this time she has gone way too far. About halfway through the film, she gets all-out nakey and her clothes stay off for the rest of this raunchy romp. The old mortician man cannot stop thinking about her bouncy body, and what a body it is!
No stunt-butts here my friends. I knew she had a rack, but who knew she had a full-on 100% hourglass body that just won't quit? Did you know that only 15% of girls have an hourglass body? This is why this naughty nubile gets a 10 star nipple-tingling rating from this labia lover. At 29, she's tipping the scales at nearly too old for a woman to be naked on film, butt go ahead and give it a go.
My 'gina thanked me with a nice little splish-splash before the credits rolled out. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
Three privileged female volleyball players transfer to the barrio high school of rivals when their private campus burns down. (95 mins.)
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&&What is this movie all about? Teenage girl bodies in tight as hell volleyball outfits. Once you start watching the flick, all you've got is a tingly V or a manbone that is just waiting to be relieved.
Turn down the lights, get under the covers, light 7 candles, and get your mound-motor running until the job gets done. Adrienne Bailon and Sarah Wright are both 23 yo here, and they show us just how far girl power can go. They take volleyball playing to a whole new level when they learn that butts and legs get sculpted to perfection when they work out every day and stop eating like greedy cows. We can all take a lesson from this mov and learn to be hotter than bacon grease if we will just stop eating and let those calories out into the restaurant toilet once in a while.
There is nothing wrong with it as long as the stomach is flat and the body is tight.
Go team!&& - melissaogasaki
Four teenage boys enter a pact to lose their virginity by prom night. (95 mins.)
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&&My pie tingles every time I watch this flirty flick on my fallopian tube. Our cute little firecrotch Alyson Hannigan is a tight bodied 22 yo when she reveals that she likes to insert a silver plated flute into her eagerly awaiting love pudding each summer at high school band camp. Super-tramp Tara Reid is a slightly older 23 yo who is playing an iron-box virgin who won't give it up to her sackless effiminate bf. Don't worry, we've got a t the cute lil' 18 yo Mena Suvari with her petite body and little perky boobs that just won't quit.
Please do not forget 19 yo Natasha Lyonne who was offered the part on Dawson's Creek that Katie Holmes played. Guess what, she said she didn't want to be on a television show bc it might restrict her movie career. What a dumb bitch...when was the last time you saw Natasha in a movie?
This teen sex mov is all about losing your virginity inside of a hot teenage girl's jizztrap and not pulling out even if you promise her that you will. We all know that boys lie to get girls to lie on their backs.&& - melissaogasaki
In this sequel to the hit comedy , the high school students are now in college. These close friends decide to meet up at the beach house for some fun. (108 mins.)
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&&The main thing to remember about this twat tingling flickity flick, is that the pies in American Pie 2 are two years older. We must be careful in our judgment here.
We don't want no saggy pies. Alyson Hannigan brings her A-cup game into this one, and sluts it up like her daddy taught her when she was going through the awkward years. Tara Reid stays slutty, and it is just impossible to stop looking into her bright blue Aryan eyes no matter how old she is.
Do not forget to check out 20 yo Mena Suvari's butt that just got bigger this year because her body is still developing.
Let's face it, many girls are not done developing their bodies until they hit 20 or 21 yo.
Shannon Elizabeth makes a topless debut, which resulted in my g-spot making a gooey debut when I watched the webcam scene. What will this movie do to your pie while you watch it? I don't know, but I can tell you that it Americanized me. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
Two teenage girls discover a mermaid in their beach club's swimming pool. (104 mins.)
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&&A blonde, innocent, and very stuck-up 17 yo Sara Paxton stars in this movie about several horny teenage girls who turn into mermaids every time their hot teen bodies get wet...and it seems to happen pretty often in this filthy film. Sure, it may be a rip-off of Splash, but their bodies are much tighter and younger than Daryl Hannah's 23 yo body.
Is it inappropriate to call this one Scale-Bait? Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
Sue, Cheryl and Lexi are best friends. They do something special every year for their birthday as they were all born on the same day. Now their 18th birthday, they set out to lose their virginity. (89 mins.)
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&&23 yo Jeneta St. Clair, 21 yo Lisa Younger, and 22 yo Melissa Johnston are all playing 18 yo barely legal bitches that need to lose their virginity, so they all decide to do it on the same day. I'm not kidding. This is literally the premise of the movie. Too bad these girls don't swing both ways because they could just do each other with their digits and toys that can easily be ordered from dirty magazines.
It's their birthday, but presents aren't the only thing they're unwrapping. Nudity is flying at us left and right as we see titties, twenty year old butts, and even a shot of Melissa Johnston's totally shaved 22 year-old snatch. Because it is shaved, we can see the top of her cute lips just before she slips in to the shower to clean up her slippery slit.
Make sure you watch the unrated version so you can see the lezbionic scenes that almost made my mound explode.&& - melissaogasaki
An intergalactic babe borrows her dad's T-bird ship to do a little planet-hopping with her two friends... (75 mins.)
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&&Sometimes we just get tired of naked bodies from the planet Earth.
If you have ever seen 'Bikini Carwash Company', or 'Bikini Summer', then this is pretty much the same friggin' movie.
25+ breast implanted hoebags dancing around to music on a California beach that comes from nowhere.
In this movie, whores from another planet steal daddy's spaceship and land in southern California to dance around and wave their boobies and boxes until some jerkoff slides his American sausage into their alien snootches just to shut them up. They are better off for the experience, and tell daddy all about it when they take the busted up spaceship back home.
Daddy eventually says that it is ok, if his daughter's and her 2 friends dance around in bikinis for a few minutes.
That is the price they must all pay for intergalactic grand-theft spaceship.&& - melissaogasaki
A group of friends are hired to redecorate a beach house while the elderly owners are out of town for the summer... (87 mins.)
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&&If you like old washed up breast-implanted bikini bimbos, then this is the movie for you. All of my friends are younger and tighter than these leather-faced hags with boobs that look like 2 fried eggs hangin' on a nail.
Good luck trying to get a c-bone or d-bone with this one bc there are no teenagers in this movie at all. Boo. Hey, put dem drunk goggles on, and pretend they aren't middle-aged saggy maggies.
When I was a very little girl, I used to watch these kind of movies on USA 'Up All Night' where Gilbert Godfried was the host and made sexual pun jokes at every commercial break.
I miss that old Heeb.
Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
A champion high school cheerleading squad discovers its previous captain stole all their best routines from an inner-city school and must scramble to compete at this year's championships. (98 mins.)
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&&A never been touched down there 17 yo Kirsten K. Dunst shows us just how hot her body can get before she's legally allowed to have casual sex in the state of California. What did this flirty flick really bring on? A full-on dripping orgasm after the introductory scene where we are supposed to imagine little Kiki naked in front of the entire school body. We all know Kirsten has finally took the top off in 'Melancholia' and 'All Good Things', so just memorize her older boobs first, and then make her boobs time travel back in your mind to 17 years old.
Her little dance did it for me downstairs during the first 5 minutes of this teen cheer mov. Bammo!&& - melissaogasaki
A fashion-conscious youngster is horrified when she is forced to move to military school. (101 mins.)
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&&OMG, this has got to be one of my favorites TV movies of all time! Our cute little Hilary's Duff is barely 16 yo in this movie about a spacey, schoolgirl outfitted, hippie-headed little boobed blonde who gets shipped off to a military academy after her horny mommy dates a military man. It's ok, because she meets many hotties along the way and eventually learns to fit in after fingering late at night under the covers.
You'll have to find the super-rare NC-17 version in Japan to see Hilary's orgasm scene. We all know that Hilary develops her melons and roundy-round at age 18, but we are allowed to check out her tight bod before it fills out. I hope that Hell is not a real place, because watching this movie may actually send me there due to the perverse thoughts which keep entering my mind along with the tingling that cannot be stopped down there.
It will probably be worth it in the end... and Hilary's end is so tight at 16, I am willing to chance it.&& - melissaogasaki
Multicharacter teenage comedy about high school graduates with different agenda of life on graduation night. (100 mins.)
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&&What a tingly tale for my tail tonight.
We have an all-star cameo cast for my cont in this naughty film.
Here we go, Jennifer Love Hugetits is a nice little 18 yo barely legal teen who is dating the jerk-off football player.
Lauren Ambrose is a 19 yo ginger firecrotch before she starred in 'Six Feet Under'.
Melissa Joan Hart is a 21 yo cheerleader yearbook girl with blonde pigtails that could make me squeal all night long.
Don't forget 20 yo Jaime Pressly before she hit the wall and lost her looks, and 25 yo Selma Blair who isn't allowed to say one word during her one scene because we did not want to see any wrinkles showing.
If you like watching drunk horny teen girls and Seth Green playing a super-wigger, then this is the mivvity mov 4 U!&& - melissaogasaki
After a painful breakup, Ben develops insomnia. To kill time, he starts working the late night shift at the local supermarket, where his artistic imagination runs wild. (102 mins.)
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&&This lonely Brit store clerk has way too much time on his hands at work after his gf Suzy (played by 21 yo English muffin Michelle Ryan) breaks up with him and moves on like George Clooney. This limey develops insomnia and fantasizes about Sharon the checkout girl (played by 29 yo old sock Emilia Fox) during the graveyard shift. His artistry allows him to undress the women he sees with x-ray vision and we all get to watch. He draws dirty dick pictures in his sketchbook and wanks off like a wanker in the bathroom as we all watch.
Eventually he gets what he wants, but all we are really left with is a mov that we are guessing the plot of, while hottie models walk by and by.
Oh my my!!!&& - melissaogasaki
A doctor hires an escort to seduce her husband, whom she suspects of cheating, though unforeseen events put the marriage in danger. (96 mins.)
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&&A slutty and sultry 23 yo Amanda Seyfried stars in this movie about a prostitute whose ultimate goal is to lie to Julianne Moore about husband handjobbies, and to eventually eat her raunchy ole rug like there's no tomorrow. Our no-no places get to throb when the R-rated full on female nudity occurs, and a no weenie sex scene ensues.
Chloe gets her way, and forces Julianne to jizz.
Don't forget about the big butt we see on Amanda these days. She must be proud of it, or we she wouldn't have shown it off to millions of eagerly awaiting horndogs, all grabbing their goo-filled gobs in the back row of the movie theater. Boys make me sick! Big bottomed girls, you make the rockin' world go round!&& - melissaogasaki
A rich high school student tries to boost a new pupil's popularity, but reckons without affairs of the heart getting in the way. (97 mins.)
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&&Alicia Silverstone trots out her infamous pouty lip in this sexy teen-tramp film about a self-absorbed hottie with the million dollar body who needs to get off any which way butt loose. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing loose on that body.
At 18, Alicia really knows how to please my P when she talks about putting things in her mouth to make sure that boys think about sex.
Cher is dumb as hell, but stays sizzling hot in her super-tight preppy-clothes for the hole damn movie. Don't worry, Amanda Seyfried and Brittany Murphy join the gorgeous gina-clan, so we can watch all three of their young beautiful bodies walk around on screen for 97 minutes. Oh Alicia, why won't you return my nasty twitter tweets anymore? This is an 8 star ovary box-office blowout. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
A teenage girl is convinced that her home city revolves around her until her family packs up and moves to the suburbs, where she finds herself competing for attention. (89 mins.)
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&&Our lusty little Lindsay Lohan is barely 17 when she stars in this airhead teen comedy about a girl who wants to get with her fav band's singer. She pretends what it might be like to have sex for the first time each night before she goes to bed.
She is not above breaking out the electric toothbrush that her daddy bought her for Christmas. Don't worry, the rockstar's penis gets too trashed to ravage our little Lilo's untouched twat. He passes out, and she is left all alone and horny so she has no choice butt to give herself a secret fingerbang while he sleeps his hangover off. The real confession is all about her ability to please herself just like I can each and every night.&& - melissaogasaki
Three childhood best friends, and a guy they just met, take a road trip across the country, finding themselves and their friendship in the process. (93 mins.)
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&&Our bad little schoolgirl Britney Spears stars in this teen girl film about three 18 yo girls who need to get away from daddy's watchful eye and go on a roadtrip to California with a strange man who may or may not be a serial-killer. Remember when our little virgin Brit was only 16 and innocent in that super-slutty schoolgirl music video?
It started an underage teen girl fetish that has just gotten worse with each and every year.
Girls all over the world started acting like sloppy sluts in order to keep up with what all the boys wanted. She's my hero. Bad little Britney is actually almost 20 yo here, but we'll forgive her after we see her naughty little underwear dance in the opening scene. In another scene, she almost loses her virginity to Justin Long, but he is too much of a pussy to force his way up into her teen love tunnel. She may not lose her choo-choo cherry in that scene, but she does come out of the bathroom in matching pink undies and we get to see what little Louisiana has goin' on upstairs and downstairs. Ohhhhhh, here comes the goo-goo juice! Thirty-two minutes in, there is an all out cat fight between all three girls. The uppity black, the trailer trash preggo, and our dear little darling Britney Rears. She must be a terrorist, cause he body is da bomb! Boom!
I'm glad busty Britney is making a comeback, cause I just made a comeback in my panties.&& - melissaogasaki
A non-glamorous portrayal of the lives of people who make their living at a strip club. (123 mins.)
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&&Why is this movie in a list of teen girl movies?
I don't know, but after I gave this stripper movie a chance, I realized that it was worth it.
Sometimes us girls need a different type of movie to slide in a finger or two sideways on a lonely Saturday night.
I have to admit that I've always been a fan of tight-assed Daryl Hannah, and big-boobied Jennifer Tilly. We know from watching 'Splash', that Aryan Daryl just can't keep her clothes on, and from watching 'The Getaway' that crazy ass Jennifer Tilly goes nuts on everyone bc she's a typical emotionally unstable woman. The Blue Iguana is a strip club where dreams go to die, and the dumbest of the dumb strippers end up working. Turn down the lights, do a big ole line of Coca-Moca, and bootie dance to the stripclub music like there's no tomorrow.
You can thank me for it later.&& - melissaogasaki
Nicole Maris is a popular high school preppy senior in Utah who gets her life turned upside down when her perfect date... (91 mins.)
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&&You know what drives me crazy? A 21 yo Melissa Joan Hart who keeps growing her boozies and butt like it's going out of style. She sho don't look 21 because I totally believe that she is sweet and 17.
I guess I fell for it during 'Sabrina' the 1995 movie where she plays a 16 year old and she really does look 16.
MJH is just one of those girls that looks younger than she really is, and we love her for that.
In 'Drive Me Crazy', my little Melissa is old enough to legally drink alcohol, and she drinks it like a fish.
Her fav poison is Gin, and when she drinks
it makes her lazy eye drift around like a flying saucer on &Lost In Space&!
It's ok though, because we will never forget that Melissa Joan Hart has a heart-shaped hiney that will never quit.
My secret naughty muscle gets all tingly and wet just thinking about how I would caress and worship every square inch of that angelic ass.
I bet even her poops smell like strawberries and rose petals.
Text me back hun, and we will make this magical night happen anytime you are ready for some Asian action.
Bamm-Bam-A-Lam!&& - melissaogasaki
A small-town beauty pageant turns deadly as it becomes clear that someone will go to any lengths to win. (97 mins.)
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&&This time sweet little 16 yo Kirsten KiKi Dunst is a shy trailer-trash hottie wit da body who wants to win an underage beauty pageant with her tight and tawdry body. Somehow, only one of the judges is a perv. The stuck-up rich slut who is her main competition is 27 yo Denise Richards. Who knew that a woman so old could still have a tight body with DD boobies that refuse to droop. Thank you Dr. Solarno. The beauty of these bodies yanks my young yahoo every time I watch these googly gals. Look away when big ole' fatty fat Kirstie Alley elephants her way across the screen as the mommy of Denise Richards.
Let us focus on the teen action so that we can complete the fj before the movie is over.&& - melissaogasaki
A clean-cut high school student relies on the school's rumor mill to advance her social and financial standing. (92 mins.)
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&&What's easy about this flick? Emma Stone's 21 yo vagina. She may not be as whorish as her reputation is in this movie, but don't let the Hollywood story here fool you. We know from Jim Carrey, that she loves to get on all fours and bark like a dog while you spank her with a paddle. Don't ask me why she gets off on it, bad girls just like to get spanked and they deserve it. She decides to one up her dark-skinned bff to see who can get the sluttiest reputation.
Easy Emma is not above taking cash for a dirty story that didn't happen.
I kinda like that idea.
I wouldn't mind getting paid for making up dirty stories that never happened.
Give me a job Penthouse Forum!&& - melissaogasaki
A high school teacher's personal life becomes complicated as he works with students during the school elections, particularly with an obsessive overachiever determined to become student body president. (103 mins.)
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&&Holy freakin' moly! We have been waiting for 25 yo Reese to get raunchy since she pulled out her boobies in her first movie &Twilight& in 1998. Since then she's been taking frigid ice queen roles where she doesn't put out for manipulating men.
This is not acceptable.
We all need some manmeat every once in awhile, and there is nothing wrong with it.
We get to hear that the real Reese get wetter than any teen that her teacher has taken advantage of so far. That is an accomplishment. Frack me Mr. M, frack me Mr. M, frack me Mr. M!!! Now we know exactly what she sounds like during sex. You know who I'm going to vote for in the election? More teacher/student sex scenes in teen movies from now on.&& - melissaogasaki
A New York City doctor, who is married to an art curator, pushes himself on a harrowing and dangerous night-long odyssey of sexual and moral discovery after his wife admits that she once almost cheated on him. (159 mins.)
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&&You know what makes my eyes shut? The old and saggy women in having orgie sex in a weird cult mansion in this movie. Make sure you get the director's cut so that you don't see the ridiculously edited weird sex scenes that the idiot censors came up with.
The only real hottie in this film is 15 yo Leelee Sobeiski. I have to admit that Nicole Kidman somehow still looks hot at a ripe old age of 29 yo. How is this possible? She drinks the blood of underage virgins just like Countess Dracula did and it's working for her. That body don't look like no 29 year old as we are allowed to see her topless and in tight white undies next to Tom Cruise who wants nothing to do with her hot bod. I'm sorry Nicole, you're just barking up the wrong tree, Tom may not be as hetero as you thought. Let's get back to the real hottie... Leelee Sobieski. We will see her name several more times in this teen movie list. Guess what wankers, she's literally a 15 yo Russian actress playing a 15 yo Russian daughter who rebels against daddy by prick teasing 2 older drunk guys in daddy's house in the infamous underage underwear scene. She will only get cast as a young slut from here on because that's what the audience wants to see.
Don't forget to see her in 'Tart' 2001, 'Pumpkin' 2002, 'Walking All Over Me', 'Girl' 1998, 'Face/Off' 1997, and 'Lolita' 1997 (where she is a tight and tart little 14 yo). How has this hottie gotten away with teenage tramp films in the USA? We don't know... butt when a miracle occurs, you shouldn't ask too many questions. Bammo!&& - melissaogasaki
A teacher is harassed by a group of snotty, popular cheerleaders who think they can get away with anything. However, the teacher has no intention of taking their rude behavior. (88 mins.)
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&&What do we have here? A high-school full of hottie hoe cheerleaders of Deutsche descent jerking off everyone else who gets in their way. Don't miss the scene where they visit a porn store in their uniforms and make a dirty little youtube vid for us all to watch while we drip our dirty little juices all over the white livingroom couch. Oopsie. Don't worry, Shout gets it out everytime with its oxygenated action. Their pussy powers are fully activated as soon as they start to bully the slightly less hot other cheerleaders, and then the whore-off contest is on like Donkey Kong in an Atari factory. Who wins? Well, you and your hoo-hoo are just going to have to watch to find out.&& - melissaogasaki
A group of Southern California high school students are enjoying their most important subjects: sex, drugs and rock n' roll. (90 mins.)
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&&Ah, the classics - way back in the day before my mommy and daddy got horny for each other and did the deed that resulted in this horny little girl's movie list.
Remember high school? These guys are all about it. A 19 yo Jennifer Jason Leigh plays a 15 yo virgin who gets plowed in a baseball dugout by a complete stranger that reminds her of daddy. I wonder why he never calls her again? Then she meets a horny Mex who spazzes out on top of her after 10 seconds and makes her pay for her own abortion. No joke. It was totally worth her 30 seconds of pleasure. Don't miss the 18 yo Phoebe Cates' big boobie bikini scene where Judge Reinhold is wankin' his wookie like there's no tomorrow in the bathroom and gets caught by his sister's bff. How many times has that bikini scene been rewinded over and over and slow-motioned until the the DVD falls apart from wear?
Right on dude!&& - melissaogasaki
The two most popular guys in high school decide to ditch football camp for cheerleader camp. For the girls and for the glory. (90 mins.)
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&&You know what gets me fired up? Teen girls in cheerleader outfits stretching their legs up to the sky like it's 1999. Sure, it's been 10 years since 1999, but they don't know bc cheerleaders are dumb as hell...and that's the way we like them. A ripe and old 24 yo Sarah Roemer plays the part of 17 yo Carly, 21 yo Annalynne McCord plays the part of 18 yo Gwyneth, and super hottie 14 yo Juliette Goglia plays the part of 14 yo Poppy. Ooooooh, who is the hottest hottie in this FU film? The teen tramp who also stars in 'Easy A' 2010 with Emma Stoned. Let's fire up the fireplace, place new batteries in the pocket rocket, and pop some popcorn before little Juliette Goglia loses her innocence in her cheerleader uniform.
Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
April (age 15) is running from one bad situation into another, hoping to find an answer that doesn't involve nudity, and falls in with a group of confused kids chasing their dreams. The black widow in the web is the sexy, pot-dealing Sally. (88 mins.)
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&&Little 15 yo April has come to Hollyweird, CA to find her future. And what a dirty future she has in store for her. The part of April is played by our cute little 17 yo Willa Holland. She gives head for a fake ID, takes $450 from a creepy guy who takes naked pics of her, and ends up working for a sexually dominant ex-stripper. Don't forget the homeless singer dude who hooks up with a 17 yo preppie who is slumming to make her daddy mad. She puts out on the first night and makes sure that Sammy has no chance to pull out. We've got homelessness, drug use, bisexuality, underage pornography, and sado-masochism. The nudity level is low, but the implied nudity and horny levels are through the friggin roof. I have to give this one a 9.2 wetty factor score.&& - melissaogasaki
A wealthy student with too much fashion sense, her equally rich friends, and her rival/superior from the school paper work together to solve the case when their teacher goes missing. (83 mins.)
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&&This TV movie should be called 'Get a Glue', bc my snatch has been dripping white for the last 83 minutes. I've always had a teen fixation for little Lilo ever since 'The Parent Trap' trapped my heart back in the day when I was twelve. Little 15 yo Lindsay plays the part of rich little Prada wearing 12 yo Lexy who gets everything she wants. Do you know what I want? Little Lilo in my bed before all the legal drama happened. This is an action-packed adventure filled with a flirty little fifteen teen who has a stinky pinky for her missing teach. Now it's not so much of a mystery how Lilo turned into a 'Bad Girls Club' trick hoe. For shizzle.&& - melissaogasaki
A straight-A teen explores Portland's rock scene. (99 mins.)
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&&Hold the phone hoebags, we've got an all-star sexy slut lineup in this teen comedy where a good girl turns bad. Our fav little bad schoolgirl Dominique Swain is a sweet 17 actress playing an 18 yo straight-A student who wants to turn bad in the big city. More movies need to follow this trend of having younger teens play older teenagers. Selma Blair at 25 yo is the best friend also playing an 18 yo, butt don't worry...she's still hot and hadn't cut the hair off yet or gained any face weight. Super slut Tara Reid is 22 yo playing an 18 yo hoe in this hot teen combination of 'Clueless' and 'She's All That'. This naughty tale is Rated R for sexuality, language, and teen alcohol and drug use. That's a good movie in my book.&& - melissaogasaki
Maggie Peyton, the new owner of Number 53 - the free-wheelin' Volkswagen bug with a mind of its own - puts the car through its paces on the road to becoming a NASCAR competitor. (101 mins.)
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&&'Herbie Fully Loaded'. Seriously? What kind of pervert named this mov while we all know that horny little 18 yo Lilo was screwing drug dealers left and right for nickle bags of coke. She's winking at us, bc she knows that we know, and she also knows that her entire nose in numb because she is high as hell.
Lindsay plays the part of Maggie, but she is far from an old and saggy Maggie. The car she gets as a graduation present makes her really horny for the mechanic that works on it, and he takes advantage of the situation. But Herbie has a mind of his own, and protects little Lilo from the horndog and lets Lindsay romp around on his stick shift when she needs that sweet release.&& - melissaogasaki
A young woman who was missing reappears, but she claims to be someone else entirely. (105 mins.)
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&&20 yo Lindsay Lohan was just beginning to come into her legal troubles when this *beep* movie was made for her horny fans to gawk over late at night when no one else is watching. She plays a 17 yo goodie-two-shoes who disappears and then returns as a bad girl stripper who shags like a minx. We're all pretty sure that Lilo only did this movie so she dance around in a strip club. We get to see those enhanced melons, but no nip is exposed. You wanna know what killed me? My carpal tunnel the next day after my right middle finger finished its 42 minute job.&& - melissaogasaki
A newly possessed high school cheerleader turns into a succubus who specializes in killing her male classmates. Can her best friend put an end to the horror? (102 mins.)
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&&What is Jennifer's Body? A sweet and sexy, meant to be penis-plowed 21 yo Megan Fox. They cover up her nasty-assed tattoos for this one, butt you get to see all she has to offer, including a sensual and sexy slut kiss between her and 23 yo Amanda Seyfried. You've got a tight package Megan, and we are rewarded with a big-bootie Amanda/Megan lezbo scene that is worth your time fo' sho! I almost forgot how old they are, during that lesbionic animatronic scene.
But my white bedsheets have not forgotten what happened last night, and I will need to steam clean the love juice out of there.&& - melissaogasaki
Spurred by divine voices and visions, a 15th-century teen leads French forces against the English. (180 mins.)
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&&Little blonde Leelee has done it again!
Our sweet lil' lass was 14 yo when she filmed this TV movie for our eagerly awaiting eyes.
Scene after scene, this nubile messenger inspires the Army of France to fight towards freedom.
I would fight for Leelee anytime as long as I got to grope her while she slept every once in awhile.
Let's remember that this was before the double cowardly disasters of WWI and WWII proved that the Frogs have never had nationalism or courage, but that is another discussion.
Neil Patrick Harris plays the King of France that is not attracted at all to Leelee...oh wait, that actually does make sense now.
Even in her death scene, sweet and sultry Sobieski is as cute as a button.
She gives a whole new meaning to the phrase &a hot little number&.&& - melissaogasaki
A woman faces deadly consequences for abandoning her loving relationship with her boyfriend to pursue exciting sexual scenarios with a mysterious celebrity mountaineer. (100 mins.)
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&&This S&M flick is out of this list's age-range for sure, but we can assume that the 31 yo Heather Graham is getting what she deserves for being a little bit older than what this hunky man has been used to. Old and saggy Maggie gets a good ole plowin' in the backdoor when she's all tied up in ropes.
That's not really that weird is it?
I mean, they're married aren't they?
You can't really rape a married woman can you?
It's a love story about a guy who loves his girlfriends...to be tied up with ropes.
At least we get to see her bare bosoms to detract from that Neanderthal forehaed she has on her.
Ooga Booga, Ooga Booga.&& - melissaogasaki
In this Nick Jr. television show, a pink-haired girl named Stephanie moves to LazyTown with her uncle (the mayor of LazyTown), where she tries to teach its extremely lazy residents that physical activity is beneficial. (30 mins.)
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&&I know this is a TV show, but holy moly!
Before you judge me, let's all remember that Julianna Rose Mauriello was already 14 yo when the show started, and was an astounding 22 yo by the time the show was cancelled.
So there is nothing wrong with loving this lovely little Lazytown lass.
She's got the energy and body to keep all of us working out so that we do not get lazy.
I am officially a fan of all Icelandic girls, lazy or not.
She is of consenting age in her home country, so let us not judge another nation, lest we be judged ourselves.
Oh Julianna, please respond to my IMDB list so we can meet in Iceland and I shall buy you a Humpback Whale soup dinner.&& - melissaogasaki
A race of space vampires arrive in London and infect the populace. (116 mins.)
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&&Have all you nerds done your math homework? Good, because 20 yo Mathilda May is here to make sure that the direction of your erection is proportional to the cube of the boob as long as the gravity of her cavity + the mass of her ass is held constant. The derivative of my white cotton panties has been taken into account because the heat of her meat is equal to the square of my hair. She has decided to play the part of a hot-bodied female alien who for some reason walks around a space station completely nakey and blows the balls off any man who cannot stop staring at her English muffin. She may seem fat for today's standards, butt don't judge her too harshly...I got a full-on gina-jizz at the 30 minute mark.&& - melissaogasaki
A man marries his landlady so he can take advantage of her daughter. (137 mins.)
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&&Jeremy Irons shows his anagram &genuine class& when he plays the part of a middle aged man who marries a widowed woman just to get at her little 13 yo daughter. Dominique Swain plays the ball teasing tart and is actually 14 in this clit-tingling Texas film that knows no bounds. Everything is big in Texas, even the age differences. How did they get away with it? The movie &release& was delayed by two years, and they put a pillow between the genitals of Dominique and horny ole Jeremy while he was humpin' away like there's no law against it. True topless teen nudity in a movie?
Can it be real? Idk, I just watched it and wanked it. She prolly didn't even feel his big ole man-bone through that pillow.
Her parents were completely protective of her and she never turned into a horny girl...oh wait, they weren't and she did. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
The twisted tale of Kenneth, socially insecure technical writer who forms an obsessive relationship with "Nikki"... (88 mins.)
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&&Are you in the mood for a twisted tale about a man who just can't find Ms. Right? Men can always buy love if they have the right amount of cash, so this guy just buys a love doll named Nikki and throws her on the floor after he ravages the *beep* out of her on the first night. Miss Love Doll doesn't like being treated like that, but she will put up with it as long as he stays faithful. He's a man, so he cheats on his lover Nikki immediately with a trick hoe named Lisa that he met at work. Don't worry, we get to see both of the women's naked bodies over and over. I was dripping wet by the end of this flick bc I love female rivalry - it does the trick for me every time.&& - melissaogasaki
On a Caribbean cruise, Jenny is marooned on a beach with her rock and roll idol. Deliriously in love with the idea of time alone with him, she manages to hide the fact that they're a stone's throw away from their resort. (87 mins.)
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&&Our outcast, schizo, chocolate-loving Amanda Bynes is an 18 yo blue bikini wearing hottie in this little clit flick. Filmed right before the end of &What I Like About You&, our little 'Manda finally got her boobs in, (some say they were placed in) but still has a tight teen stomach and a rockin' tight ass. She never changes out of the blue bikini, and keeps that cute little daddy's girl voice during this twat-tingling teen comedy. Oh, Amanda...I liked you before you went crackhead choco-crazy.&& - melissaogasaki
Cady Heron is a hit with The Plastics, the A-list girl clique at her new school, until she makes the mistake of falling for Aaron Samuels, the ex-boyfriend of alpha Plastic Regina George. (97 mins.)
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&&Where does my snatch even start on this one? Well, our 17 yo coked-out Hollywood bad girl Lindsay Lohan plays the nerd girl gone hot in this high school pussy-tease flick that gave me a fab five finger-licious full on drippy. Don't forget that 17 yo Amanda Seyfried is here and is beginning to grow her round rump in preparation for her big bootie movies to come. And we must not leave out all-grown-up 21 yo Lacey Chabert from the 'Party of Five' TV show, who finally got her boobs in.
Don't let that age fool you, she still has a rockin' teen body that really needs to be ravaged by a petite Asian girl by the name of Melissa.
The moral of this movie is: sell out your fat gay friend to hit up the teen hotties with the million dollar bodies. It's a no brainer. The queen bee Rachel McAdams really hits the wall fast, so enjoy looking at her hotness while you can.
Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
Set during a crazy afternoon in the lives of a dozen college students at a co-ed dorm that starts with the arrival of two very different women with the same name of Dominique. (96 mins.)
Director: ,
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A high school girl is invited to a party by the most popular boy in school -- only trouble is, she's grounded. (92 mins.)
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&&The above description is a little off. &Haughty head cheerleader&...more like naughty head cheerleader. The is a scene about 14 minutes in, where our little 22 yo sweetie takes a nude shower after stripping out of her oh so tight cheerleader uniform. Since this is a PG movie, we don't see the nips, but we do get to see her tatas flop around as she practices her &routine& in the shower.
What did I picture when I watched this film? Ashley and I underneath the covers during a sleepover after we play truth or dare and I dared her to soak my pink panties.
Zing Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
A seductive teen befriends an introverted high school student and schemes her way into the lives of her wealthy family. (90 mins.)
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&&Our fav little 16 yo weird-nosed cokehead Drew Barrymore, and 16 yo trailer trash Sara Gilbert star in this first installation of the seductive series that gets my slit started like a slutty inverted sausage on Oktoberfest. This movie is all about teenaged bad girls, and horny middle-aged daddies.
We find out that Drew likes Sarah's daddy, and wants to replace the suicidal mommy, but when Sara walks in on doggy-style standing up sex with dear old dad, she gets jello like there's no tomorrow. Someone has to die at this point, butt I don't wanna ruin the super-sticky ending. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
Lily is a sheltered art student from Michigan going to school in California. She finds an apartment and her roommates aren't quite normal... (106 mins.)
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&&An old and aging 23 yo Alyssa Milano is 'The Boss' in this sultry S&M tale about boobies that must be released for all to see. Butt before my dripping snatch releases it's vengeance on the yeast infection that is brewing in my box as we speak, I must say that Italian tramps just don't do it for me anymore...this one gets a low 4 stars out of ten for a no-tease tingly in the no-no place. I do not have to confess to Father Flannigan for this one. She ruined her reputation for hotness when she reprised her role in 'Charmed' and I am so fracking sick of her, I am immune to the gravitational pull of her two massive boobies.
There's just something about her that I just cannot stand.
Boo!&& - melissaogasaki
A sinister seductress vows to destroy a suburban family. (95 mins.)
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&&A tight bodied 19 yo Jaime Pressly stars in this bonerific T&A pussy pleasing series where once again daddy gets pleasured by the teenage tramp who has just walked into his lonely blue-balled life. What an ass Jaime has in this ovary-actioned trampy tale about a young teen seducing the deserving daddy. There is nothing wrong with an &enormous& age difference as long as he's got the cash to pay for the ass. It's OK if you have pouty lips hun...we all know that daddy's girls can be bought. Shell out the dough, and turn out the hoe. That's what I learned from my BFF's father one night after I was babysitting his big-headed baby and the mom was out of town.
I have a new pair of sapphire earrings now.
Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
After a mysterious death of a young college student occurs late one night at a prestigious New England college... (95 mins.)
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&&OMG LOL, we all got to see little Miriam McDonald (13-20 yo) grow up on &Degrassi: The Next Generation&, where she takes girl power to a whole new level by associating girl-power with stripping nude in front of the entire class to protest an energy drink, bj's in a stranger's van, hj's in the school parking lot, and getting mad at your step-dad for not staring at your boobs when you get out of the shower.
I love the neo-feminist movement, as long as it gets the job done. Now, Miriam is 20 years old in this mature mov, and she has no problem getting used and penetrated by a penis while she shows us her fully developed natural watermelons. Old McDonald had a farm and clit-flick is her Name-O. This big breasted hottie nearly gave me blue-ovaries until I finger-slapped my sloppy slit for seven minutes during the sex scene. I was so worn out, I let my right middle finger stay in there baking like a Thanksgiving turkey for 2 about hours until I was able to finally take a shower and clean off all the plum juice. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
Four Los Angelenos -- a mortician, an ex-con, a suicidal ex-priest, and a stripper -- are brought together on Christmas Eve by a mixture of circumstances. (106 mins.)
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&&If you've always wanted to see Jessica Biel dancing around topless in a strip club, then this is the naughty late night mov for you and your eagerly awaiting yoni. I grew up watching little Jessica's body develop on '7th Heaven' while she was 13-23 yo. It was just a good show, as you can watch all the girls on that show develop if you're patient enough.
Do not forget to check out Jessica's topless photoshoot in Gear Magazine when she was only 17 yo.
How did she get away with it?
It was a European magazine, and they are not as uptight with teen nudity as this Puritanical society is.
On 7th Heaven, we know that all the girls were all sharing one bathroom, and that there had to have been several times when they saw each other naked and judged each other's hot bodies and the sizes of the boobies and butts.
All girls do this.
I should know because I attended Catholic school.
When 7th Heaven ended, Jessica immediately went topless again in &Powder Blue& at a still young and hot bodied 24 years old. She has daddy issues and dances for horny old men, until one day her real dad shows up and she gives him a lap dance as well. I'd empty my bank account for a piece of Jessica's Biel. We get treated to three topless scenes and a real butt shot from this tasty twenty-something tramp. I'm percolating down there like an espresso machine just thinking about it.&& - melissaogasaki
A young woman struggles with depression during her first year at Harvard. (95 mins.)
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&&Yes, you will see the beautiful and barely 20 yo Christina Riccitopless in this depressing movie about depression and anti-depressants. I don't care what kind of pills she's poppin' or poopin' out, as long as those roundy rounds come out to play on my television screen. Cheer up Crissy, you have a body that just won't quit, and being a beautiful girl is the most important thing in the world.
The plot is a little bit of a downer, so take my ass-vice and turn the sound off, watch them big beautiful breasts floppin' around over that skinny, taught stomach of hers, and see where the vibe takes ya. Let it do what it do...it's off the hook.&& - melissaogasaki
A girl from a small town heads to the big city of Los Angeles to spend the summer at a performing arts high school. (103 mins.)
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&&Do you wanna know what got raised when I watched this movie? The temperature inside my hot dog warmer.
Little 22 yo Hilary lets us know that when emo effiminate boys are allowed to drive a car, it is very likely that he will drive just like a woman. Hilary's fragile brother dies, but she forgets all about him 3 days afterwards and takes off to a musical summer camp where she learns how to open her throat up. Hilary the hottie will raise more than your voice while you watch this wank worthy flick in the dark and under the covers because you have no friends and have not been laid in the last 6 weeks. My voice sounded more like &uh, uh, uh, oh, oh, oh& when I see how Little Hill's lumps have developed since Lizzie. Ba-zam!&& - melissaogasaki
A girl, sent by her parents to live with her two eccentric aunts, finds out on her sixteenth birthday that she is a witch. (91 mins.)
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&&We all know Clarissa had to grow up sometime, so even though she had just turned 18, Melissa Joan Hart plays a sweet little blonde who has just turned sweet 16.
And what a sweet body she has in this Showtime television movie.
Apparently, when a witch turns 16, she comes into her powers, and can manipulate people and events whenever she wants.
This is girl-power baby!
Another thing worth mentioning, is that our MJH's butt was in nearly full effect at age 18, but her bam-bam boozies weren't even close to being fully developed.
You'll have to watch season 1 and 2 of Sabrina the television series to watch this witchs' body turn into a real woman.
Don't think that girls do not develop after age 18.
All girls have that moment when we think that our mosquito bites may never develop into a handful, and when it happens that is when we finally put out.
This is yet another example on this movie list that proves that a girl can still develop boobies up to the age of 21.
Big ole' boobies, a flat stomach, and a ass that I would kill to squeeze is what Sabrina is all about.
Don't miss the infamous pool party bikini scene, and the dressing room bikini changing montage with her slightly less hot Jew friend which really starts the g-juices flowin'. Oh Melissa, we share the same name and we must have so much more in common.
Please hit me up for a date, and I will take you to Heaven and back baby.
You don't need no man after you meet my techniques hun.
Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
A sexually repressed woman's husband is having an affair with her sister. The arrival of a visitor with a rather unusual fetish changes everything. (100 mins.)
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&&This movie is not about teenage girls, but the implied sexuality and dirty dialogue is through the roof.
Horny old 29 yo James Spader likes to make dirty videos of women talking about dirty, nasty things. He makes them talk about fingering, orgasms, hardons and floppy balls. We get to hear every dirty detail of their downstair action. Make sure to notice 27 yo Laura San Giacomo with those big ole' boobies before she was in 'The Stand' and 'Just Shoot Me'. I would fingerbang those mighty melons all night long with my horny middle finger. Nudity is non-existant, but I wanted in on that 1980s giant video recorder action like there's no tomorrow.
It's a full-on wetty wanker for your weekend watch.&& - melissaogasaki
A neurotic writer working on his new film gets into a tricky situation when an A-list actress shows interest in the role intended for his girlfriend. (85 mins.)
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&&You know what I want? A 24 yo Hilary Duff who is somehow still in her prime even though she hasn't been a teen for 5 years. Hilary plays a super hot Hollywood actress named Kim Powers (lol) who wants to steal the role that fatty Josh Gad wrote for his gf. I can't stand fat ole Josh, so I will just ignore him until my hottie Hilary and 29 yo Kristen Ruhlin get back on screen. We don't get to see hot Hilary dance around or bend over like she used to when she was younger in 'Cadet Kelly', 'A Cinderlla Story' and 'The Perfect Man'.
That's OK, I have 100% of her body memorized so I can make her do anything I want in my mind and in my lucid dreams every single night. Thank you Hilary.
Bammo!&& - melissaogasaki
When her brother decides to ditch for a couple weeks, Viola heads over to his elite boarding school, disguised as him, and proceeds to fall for one of his soccer teammates, and soon learns she's not the only one with romantic troubles. (105 mins.)
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&&Don't let the title scare you off. This isn't some transexual tale about a woman who wants to be a man. Skinny little 19 yo Amanda Bynes shows us her tight body in soccer practice, but the mean old coach won't allow girls to be on the team. He is probably a gay. She shows everyone by putting on a fake moustache and talking just a little bit deeper, so she must be a guy now...right?
Somehow, no one figures it out. 23 yo Laura Ramsey is also on the team, and wears some nice little skimpy outfits for us to stare at. Laura starts to fall in love with Amanda's male persona, and we get to imagine lezbo scenes inside of our minds and inside of our panties. There's no nudity in this nubile flick, but I got a panty soaking like you wouldn't believe. Amanda is in a hot shower scene where we don't get to see the whole package...but I saw it in my mind and it was amazing! There is also a scene where she drops her tampons on the floor and I imagine how lucky those things really are. I bet she has a hard time just getting them in there. What a box it must be.
Manda has gone crazy lately and is literally a crack head who talks to trees and is addicted to plastic surgery, but this is why we have movies...so we can appreciate the superficial celebs before they hit the wall, lose their looks, and go *beep* crazy.&& - melissaogasaki
Nomi, a young drifter, arrives in Las Vegas to become a dancer and soon sets about clawing and pushing her way to become the top of the Vegas showgirls. (128 mins.)
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&&Sweet little Jesse Spano left the hole-some television series &Shaved By The Bell& in its last season to shave her snatch and dance around nakey for all of us to see. 22 yo Elizabeth Berkley has no problem waving her young little box around for all of us in this touching story about strippers, cocaine, and a prostitute crackhead trying to turn over a new leaf in Sin City. HBO made an edited version that cuts out much of the story and even more of her sinful skin, so make sure to get the super-nasty NC-17 version that is hotter than a Havana Omelette in a dirty blonde's butt-thole. Does the name Penny ring a bell for some reason? This 10 star slit-flick gets my goo-goo gyno goin' each and every time. The flacid jerk-off from &Sex and the City& that Charlotte marries gets a piece of 'ole Jesse, butt we don't mind, she's only about 10,000 times hotter and nastier than the Charlotte's ice-box, and she'll kick your ass tunnel at the same time...uh oh, don't wanna give away too much of the story's goods, butt that never stopped E-Sleeze-A-Beth. Take my advice and cum on over to the girl- yes, let the sticky juice flow through you.&& - melissaogasaki
A haunting portrait of Lucy, a young university student drawn into a mysterious hidden world of unspoken desires. (101 mins.)
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&&This nasty little 22 yo Aussie shows us just how experimental college girls can be in this tempting tale about girls who sleep nakey in the bed. Butt they don't sleep alone...do they? We all know that hot, desperate girls will do anything for cash, and that's why older men are so attractive. They've got the duckets.
I've sold my little slot several times when I couldn't pay my rent on time. Back to the task at finger - oops, I mean back to the task at hand. Don't miss Emily Browning's short little skirts and knee high leather boots in this flick.
Don't worry, she won't keep them on for long. At 18 minutes into the movie, Emily Browneye is forced to strip down to her tight little undies while a creepy old woman inspects every inch of her tight ginger body. I just got a two-second tingle down in the naughty no no zone while typing this. A room full of old creepy men get to inspect her body for tons of cash, and cash makes this little girl's world go round. I wouldn't mind getting groped for the right amount of green as long as the silverback was not bald. I give this Aussie a 10 star *beep* holla-back hit.&& - melissaogasaki
Four best friends, desperate to improve their social status, enter into an all-night scavenger hunt against the popular clique in their school. (89 mins.)
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&&I call this movie &Sleepunder&, because every Friday night at 10pm I turn on this finger-flick and lay on my stomach while I listen to Sara's hot little feminine voice until the v-juice drips all over my eagerly awaiting digits. I have a pillow that looks like a 7-11 banana.
A young and fit 15 yo Sara Paxton does what we all want her to do at a sleepover. Make a fake ID, meet her bald middle-aged teacher at a bar, and show off her tight, forbidden goodies just to impress the other slightly hotter popular girl in school. This is what sleepovers are all about. There are no consquences. Girl power 2004!&& - melissaogasaki
A woman moves into an exclusive New York City apartment building, which she soon discovers houses tenants with all manner of shocking secrets. (107 mins.)
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&&Why is this movie called 'Sliver'? Because the slit queen Sharon Stone stars in this hidden camera fetish flick where her sliver is on display 24/7 for William Baldwin to watch. We see that Willie wanks to several slits and even watches teenage girls get undressed and felt up by step-dads. My step-daddy was tender and caring, so when mommy was away we would play our special game that was a secret from everybody. This mov is not one of my favs, but it got my sliver sloppy during the soapy bubble bath scenes we all secretly wish we could enjoy with a Baldwin brother.&& - melissaogasaki
Katie (Lucy Hale) and Sara (Phoebe Strole) have been friends since childhood. They enter college together... (95 mins.)
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&&Sweet little barely legal 18 yo Lucy Hale, stars in this sorority whores mov where we see them leave their high-school lesbian ways &behind&, and learn the ways of the wong. We won't know why pledge week leaves Sara as a slutty Delta pledge, and Katie out of cock. Katie then joins the rival sorority Kappa Kappa Kappa and starts playing the race card 24/7.
What has this society come to?
I do believe that children are our future.
A terrifying future.&& - melissaogasaki
A young man is reunited with a mermaid who saves him from drowning as a boy and falls in love not knowing who/what she is. (111 mins.)
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&&Splish Splash I was takin' a bath, the whole time I watched this movie. It's easier to clean up afterwards, and it makes sure that everything stays all soapy and supple for the happy ending. There is a great opening scene where Tom Hanks is supposed to be an 8 yo kid who falls into the ocean so he can make out and feel up an 8 yo topless blonde mermaid played by Shayla Mackarvich. A 22 yo super-hot Daryl Hannah literally walks out of the Atlantic Ocean nude into New York City so she can find her childhood love played by Tom Hanks. We know that Daryl Hannah has an Aryan body, and that her great uncle was a guard at Bergen-Belsen, but that is not her fault.
Sometimes genetic engineering isn't that bad, isn't it?
Ba-bam!&& - melissaogasaki
Three women vacation together at a popular travel destination for college co-eds on spring break. (84 mins.)
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&&Yet another spring break movie, but this one is actually pretty good. 27 yo Amy (pole bouncing) Pohler, 40 yo Parker (old sock) Posey, and 42 yo Rachel (dried snatch) Dratch try to turn hot for spring break on South Padre after they meet the 7's. The 7's are seven hotties with 7 bodies, in 7 cut-off denim jeans. 25 yo Amber Tamblyn is the hot nerd who needs to be watched bc 28 yo Sophie Monk and 21 yo Kristen Cavallari are bullying the crap out of her. Don't worry, the 7's are supposed to be all 19 and 20 and dress the part. It was disappointing to not see any full on nudity in this mov, but with bikini bodies left and right we will forgive this movie....this time. You know what broke me down? My right index and middle fingers during the dance off competition at the end of the movie. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
After a run-in with the law, Haley Graham () is forced to return to the world from which she fled some years ago. Enrolled in an elite gymnastics program run by the legendary Burt Vickerman (), Haley's rebellious attitude gives way to something that just might be called team spirit. (103 mins.)
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&&This movie has no nudity, butt if you like tight teen butts in Gym-Nasty-Ics uniforms for 80% of the movie, then this is the one for you. 23 yo Missy Peregrym has a tight teenaged-looking body for this one, but her 20 yo co-star Vanessa Lengies has the petite, portable, fold-em-up body with a roundy round to beat the meat. Don't forget the Asian persuasion friend played by a tight and tempting 17 yo Nikki SooHoo (seriously, that's her real name lol), thrown in for good luck. Now we've got an extra naughty-nastic uniform threesome that just won't quit. Their coach is the infamous Jeff Bridges, who is tempted 3 times by these 3 vixens....but don't worry, he rubs out his temptation in the bathroom each and every time. What does &Stick It& mean? Ask my undies. Bam!&& - melissaogasaki
A popular high-school cheerleader becomes pregnant by the star quarterback and turns to crime to support her desired lifestyle. (81 mins.)
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&&Girls are made of sugar and spice but these girls are not everything nice...except for their bodies. What an all-star hottie cast we have goin' on here! Here we go...20 yo Marla Sokoloff who got her start on 'Full House' as Stephanie's 13 yo bad-girl friend who smokes cigarettes in the bathroom, and we all know that &if she smokes, she pokes.& What a bad little girl she is. 21 yo Mena Suvari who has now done boobie nudity and her nips are like weird bullets. 24 yo Melissa George, 25 yo Alexandra Holden, and 26 yo Rachel Blanchard also star as tight-bodied teens who need to rob a bank in order to pay for their knocked-up friend, 26 yo Marley Shelton. Before you freak out, they are all playing high-school cheerleaders with bodies that just won't quit and their bodies are pulling it off. There may be other types of pulling involved when you watch this movie as well. I was convinced that all of their knockers are knockouts, and that all of their butts are bodacious. Their boxes may not be pure, but nobody is perfect. If Marla Sokoloff does not get on board with the plan, bad things are going to happen.
You wanna know what can get me on board? A squad of hot teen cheerleaders in tight uniforms telling me that I need to please them until they are all satiated and their panties are soaked.
Bam-a-lam!&& - melissaogasaki
A British mystery author visits her publisher's home in the South of France, where her interaction with his unusual daughter sets off some touchy dynamics. (102 mins.)
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&&Our little Dominique Swain keeps growing up, and for some reason she keeps playing the part of a daddy's girl slut. What is it with her and older men? At the ripe ole age of 22, Dominique is a half-English, half-French euro-mutt slut who lives in daddy's vacation chalet and locks crotch with the pool man whenever she needs her knockwurst. A lezbo scene ensues with the dried up ole hag that father forked.
Fast forward past this old Saggy Maggie scene, but don't miss the totally nude, pool diving scene that make this movie a full-on robot chubby classic!&& - melissaogasaki
After her only friend is expelled from their private school in the Upper East Side of Manhattan, Cat... (94 mins.)
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&&A sweet 19 yo Dominiqu}